Standards for your future mate: conquered lust

Back when I was still single, without even a shadow of a man coming for me in the distant horizon, I worried and overanalyzed a lot about my expectations for a relationship and ultimately, marriage. 

One of my main concerns was whether or not my standards I have were too outlandish. My list wasn’t that long basically it consisted of: love the Lord, will lead me and the family, has a heart for the nations, kind, sensitive, gentle, likes to have fun and does not give into lust. 

The last item on that list was what made me question whether or not such a man even existed. It seems that every man struggles with giving into lust whether that be porn or masturbation. Often I would find myself holding that last request lightly, not really counting on the Lord bringing a man like that into my life. 

But as always, God is greater and better than we can imagine and He did bring such a man into my life. 

God took Dustin through a two year spiritual boot camp where He trained Dustin to fight against and eventually conquer lust a few years prior to our relationship. Since then, he hasn’t given into lust though the waves of temptation still come. 

I just want to encourage my sisters out there who are struggling through all those questions that plague your loneliness, trust in the Lord and you will not be put to shame. Look at and proclaim the promises of Scripture over yourself. He is a good Father who gives good gifts to His children. Just examine your own life and see the perfect way He already has led you.

There is a purpose to every painful button the Lord presses in your heart, indicators of every wound He heals before He brings someone into your life. Hold onto your standards (unless they consist of British accents, guitar playing rock star etc). Don’t convince yourself to like someone simply because he’s giving you the eye or that little grin or that guitar riff. Hold out for the best and ask God, your Father to protect your heart and confirm this is it when you think “he” showed up. 

 

For the brothers out there who are still struggling with lust, there is hope in the Lord. It is not a lost battle. When I see you guys praying for each other, asking others for prayer for this area, my heart is moved and I feel honored that you would fight against the schemes of the enemy. Just that sight reminds me of my worth as a woman, as a daughter of God. Keep going, do not grow weary in doing good.  

You can talk to Dustin too if you want about how the Lord’s trained and strengthened him in this area. The Lord has used him to encourage many brothers already. 

For the married couples out there facing this struggle in the midst of marriage, keep on fighting together with eyes fixed on the power of God rather than at our own weaknesses. Though the process may be long, victory is coming but it’s a journey. 

Remember, God wins! Bless you guys. 

*Feel free to send me questions about relationship, dating, marriage etc. I’ll try to answer them! : )